Wofgang "Wolf" Van Halen, Valerie Bertinelli, and Eddie Van Halen, 2020 | Valerie Bertinelli, 2022 | Source: YouTube.com/TODAY with Hoda & Jenna | Instagram.com/wolfvanhalen
Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen wed months after first meeting in their 20s and were close till his last breath.
The duo changed when they welcomed a son after struggling to have a baby for ten years.
Eddie and Valerie divorced, but it wasn't because they stopped loving each other.
Valerie and their son were by Eddie's bedside when he was dying.
In October 2022, it had been two years since rock star Eddie Van Halen died. To commemorate his death anniversary at the time, his ex-wife, Valerie Bertinelli, took to her Instagram Stories with a touching throwback.
The television personality shared two black-and-white images of her and Eddie back in the day. In the first Kodak photo, the former couple looked straight at the camera as they embraced lovingly.
The second picture showed them posing cheek to cheek as Valerie covered their mouths with her blouse. The photos revealed how young and happy the duo used to be together.
Valerie also paid tribute to her late ex-husband on her Instagram account by sharing a black and white picture of him posing with their son, Wolfgang "Wolf" Van Halen. The image showed a barechested Eddie playing with his topless son when the boy was much younger.
Wolf also honored his late father with a more current throwback photo of the two smiling with their heads against each other. In the post's caption, the younger Van Halen noted how a single day hadn't gone by where his father wasn't on his mind, adding:
"I'm trying to do my best and hold it together, but it's just not the same without you here, Pop."
The late singer's son concluded his post by noting how he missed and loved Eddie more than he could imagine. Wolf was lucky his parents met and fell in love all those years back because they gave him a loving and warm childhood.
Eddie and Valerie's Marriage and Their Desire for a Baby
In The Madison Courier's March 1981 edition, it was reported that after being introduced backstage in Oklahoma, Valerie, then 20, and Eddie were engaged. The rock guitarist and the actress were set to tie the knot in a private Californian ceremony on April 11, 1981.
Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen during the 38th Annual Golden Globe Awards in Beverly Hills, California, on January 31, 1981 | Source: Getty Images
The publication revealed that Valerie had been dating the then-23-year-old artist since April 1980 after meeting at a Van Halen band concert. In the actress' book, "Losing It: And Gaining My Life Back One Pound at a Time," Valerie said she's the one who mentioned marriage first.
Although the couple had been seeing each other for a short period, the actress felt marriage was the right next step. She noted how the musician adopted the marriage idea as if it was his and asked her if she wanted to marry!
In her memoir, "Enough Already: Learning to Love the Way I Am Today," Valerie noted how people weren't so supportive of their union in the early years, saying, "We were portrayed as a mismatch." She was seen as "America's sweetheart" while Eddie was the "bad boy rock star."
However, she said in private, the rock n' roll star wasn't the person others thought he was, and neither was she. The couple did marry, and according to a March 1991 The News article, the pair became first-time parents to a baby boy that month.
Wolf was born in St. John's Hospital, weighing seven pounds and thirteen ounces. Eddie was present for his only child's birth after his wife's miscarriage in 1986, with the couple trying for a baby for ten years.
An August 1991 Observer-Reporter piece revealed Eddie's infatuation with his three-month-old son as he nuzzled the boy. The child had changed him from an "impetuous" musician to a calmer and proud family man.
In "Losing It," Valerie confessed that the minute Wolf was born, she was determined to be a better person. Sadly, her marriage to the singer wasn't always easy, and things turned, but the pair remained good parents to their son.
Divorcing Eddie but Continuing to Co-parent
As Eddie and Valerie's marriage continued, the latter became frustrated by the former's smoking and drinking. She still loved him and felt like taking his life before he had a chance to drag them through hell by doing it himself.
Eddie Van Halen and Valerie Bertinelli at the "America's Sweethearts" Los Angeles Premiere in Westwood, California on July 17, 2001 | Source: Getty Images
The Food Network host ran to her brother, Drew, and complained about her marriage until he asked her why she didn't divorce Eddie. Valerie didn't agree, but her brother asked her why she'd want to continue living the way she was because it wasn't fair to either of them.
The star confessed to him that she'd considered it but wasn't keen. She was determined to bring Wolf up in a two-parent home no matter what; however, she slowly realized that the child was the one who suffered the most.
Valerie Bertinelli and Eddie Van Halen at Chasens Restaurant on March 20, 1983, in Beverly Hills, California | Source: Getty Images
One day, the actress threatened to divorce her husband if he didn't get help for his addictions, but the artist responded, "divorce me." Valerie was left shocked by the statement but felt Eddie had always wanted to say those words, and she needed to hear them.
In December 2005, the Toledo Blade reported that the couple was divorcing after being married for 24 years. The pair had been separated for four years since October 15, 2001, before Valerie filed a divorce petition citing irreconcilable differences.
In December 2007, the Lodi News-Sentinel reported that after being separated for seven years, Eddie and his wife had finally divorced amicably. However, the former couple remained good parents; at the time, a 16-year-old Wolf was on tour with his father.
Explaining how they ended up getting divorced, Valerie said they'd grown apart. She also admitted that her decision had nothing to do with how much she loved Eddie and wished him the best in life as she believed he did her.
Although the couple failed to have a forever after marriage, they raised their son well. In 2021, Wolf told People magazine that his mother had done a great job "grounding" him in his childhood before adding:
"It felt completely normal. It wasn't lavish or insane."
The bass player said Valerie balanced her's and Eddie's fame and gave him a normal childhood. Wolf was with his mother during his father's last hours on Earth, and their lives changed after his death.
Valerie and Wolf's Last Hours with Eddie and Their Lives after His Death
After their divorce, Eddie and Valerie both remarried but still shared a close bond, and when the musician's cancer spread, the former couple grew closer. During the 2019 Thanksgiving, the artist visited the television host at her home and asked to speak privately.
Wolfgang Van Halen and Valerie Bertinelli at the ceremony honoring her with a Star on The Hollywood Walk of Fame on August 22, 2012, in Hollywood, California | Source: Getty Images
Eddie handed her a bag in a friend's car with a pendant-sized gold bar he'd brought while in Germany getting cancer treatments. He told her he hoped she didn't think the gift was weird because he'd bought it for his ex-wife and got nothing for his current one.
With tears in his eyes, the rock star told Valerie he loved her. Eddie acknowledged how he'd messed up during their marriage, and the television personality noted how she'd contributed to their troubles and also apologized.
Eddie and Wolfgang Van Halen at the Van Halen press conference announcing their new tour on August 13, 2007, in Los Angeles, California | Source: Getty Images
During the final weeks of his life, the singer's ex-wife and son spent each day with him in the hospital. Even his brother, Alex Van Halen, and second wife, Janie Liszewski, surrounded him with love.
The group was also there during Eddie's final moments, and his last words to Wolf and Valerie were that he loved them. The duo repeated the words back to him before he took his last breath,
Valerie Bertinelli and her son Wolf Van Halen at the ''Cinema Against AIDS'' benefit at the Sundance Film Festival on January 22, 2001, in Park City, Utah | Source: Getty Images
The show host said she sometimes regretted holding herself back from getting "too close" to Eddie when he was sickly. However, they were both married then, with Valerie previously in union with Tom Vitale.
She [Valerie Bertinelli] said it helped that they got to exchange "I love yous" before he [Eddie Van Halen] died.
After dying at age 65, the actress acknowledged their relationship's complexity. The star said she couldn't explain the feelings they'd had for one another and that she'd loved him more than she knew how to explain, but there wasn't anything sexual about it, adding:
"It was more than that. And Ed and I understood that."
Valerie shared how there had been no greater love than the one they had, and they used it to make their son. She noted how she'd loved her ex-husband's soul, and the day after his death on October 7, 2020, Valerie shared a touching Instagram tribute to him.
The television show host said Eddie had changed her life 40 years before when she met him before giving her "the one true light" in her life, their son. She noted how he'd kept his "impish grin" and "gorgeous spirit" as he handled his treatments.
Valerie shared her gratitude for their son, that he could hold his father in his last moments, and promised to see him in their next life. About a year and a half after his death, the actress revealed to "The View" how she was coping.
She said it helped that they got to exchange "I love yous" before he died. Wolf's mother also viewed his death less as an absence, like when she had to hold herself back from wanting to call him after winning a nomination to seeing him as spiritually present.
Valerie also focused more on joy and positivity than the negative stuff. The television personality also put more stock on noticing all the good things she had in her life.
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